‘OVER-ATTACHMENT’ – I’m waiting for the day when a doctor will diagnose me with this. This might not be a regular disease but life with this is nothing less than a suffering. You, the overly detached or the cautiously attached may kick us away or stab us a hundred times but we will be there for you the moment you need us. This isn’t what one should be doing or how one should be living but we do it, ALL THE TIME. The result? Pieces of heart lying all around which we have to pick up and place together as one.
I am one of the overly attached to the severely detached or the cautiously attached. We are a special breed. Some of us might never say to you that hey there, you mean to us. This is because we ourselves at times don’t realise this. Realisation hits us the moment a gap hits our bonds. During the days when we don’t get to talk to you, see you, our symptoms of over attachment surface. Your absence hits us hard and that makes us realise the value (it’s overrated) of your presence.
Trust us that nobody, and by nobody I mean NOBODY understands you better or notices you more than us. We know exactly what kind of face you love to make while taking your selfies, we know the glitter in your eyes when you talk about your passion, we know that one dress which you absolutely love, we know when you start walking away from us, we know when you begin to replace us, WE KNOW IT ALL. Chances are that you might never have shared these details with us in person but we know it because we notice you THIS CLOSE.
We give away a part of us to all those whom we love and there can be nothing worse than this because some of us do expect to get a little back and when we don’t, it hurts.
When we are lying there at the floor at 3:00 a.m and are crying so hard, that we can’t even properly breathe, we expect to be cared for, we expect to be loved atleast by those for whom we care. Yes, we have our set of expectations but yeah who says expectations are meant to be fulfilled? We need constant reminders that this world isn’t that shitty and we are doing fine and it will all be good. Nothing hurts more than crying your heart out and realising nobody gives a damn. You might not but we will do it for you, be it any time of the day or any time of the night, if you need us, if you need to be told you are loved, cared for, trust us, we will do it ANYTIME. Does a little bit of reciprocation kill?
A bit of attachment is fine but not over attachment. Self attachment and worldly detachment is a lesson for all to learn. Feel blessed if you aren’t one overly attached soul. Feel blessed for we know what you have and we don’t. When it comes to this, your grass is much more green than ours. No doubts in that.
I am my own poetic misery.
I am an overly attached soul.